Comments on: Pleasantly Surprised > Horribly Disappointed http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/ I'm ALWAYS going the Wong way Thu, 20 Nov 2008 10:17:09 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.3 By: Derek http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-14454 Derek Mon, 02 Jun 2008 21:54:17 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-14454 Hm I suppose that the man <em>could</em> choose to see it as a good thing that the woman married someone else. But personally, I know that I'd regret not taking the chance that I had. I don't know if I particularly think that expecting the worse is less enjoyable than expecting the worst. That is, as long as my expectations don't affect how I go about it. I don't try to make my expectations into self-fulfilling prophecies, and I can avoid the disappointment of unmet expectations. I like the "hope for the best, expect the worst" mindset. Hm I suppose that the man could choose to see it as a good thing that the woman married someone else. But personally, I know that I’d regret not taking the chance that I had.

I don’t know if I particularly think that expecting the worse is less enjoyable than expecting the worst. That is, as long as my expectations don’t affect how I go about it. I don’t try to make my expectations into self-fulfilling prophecies, and I can avoid the disappointment of unmet expectations. I like the “hope for the best, expect the worst” mindset.

]]> By: Ms. Q http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-14346 Ms. Q Sun, 01 Jun 2008 04:29:34 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-14346 I don't see another person's good being someone else's disappointment. Disappointment is all about attitude. In your example of marriage, the man may choose to be happy that the woman of his dreams married someone else because he is happy she is happy. Also, expecting the worse is so much less enjoyable than expecting the best! When things don't turn out the way I want I chose to think that ultimately, things will work out for the best. I carry my beliefs because I have seen how the belief that "it's not going to work out anyway" and "life is hard" and "things never go well or are easy" are self-fulfilling prophecies. A few people very close to me have these beliefs. I don't like to see them suffer and be so unhappy but everyone has their own path to follow. I don’t see another person’s good being someone else’s disappointment. Disappointment is all about attitude. In your example of marriage, the man may choose to be happy that the woman of his dreams married someone else because he is happy she is happy.

Also, expecting the worse is so much less enjoyable than expecting the best! When things don’t turn out the way I want I chose to think that ultimately, things will work out for the best.

I carry my beliefs because I have seen how the belief that “it’s not going to work out anyway” and “life is hard” and “things never go well or are easy” are self-fulfilling prophecies. A few people very close to me have these beliefs. I don’t like to see them suffer and be so unhappy but everyone has their own path to follow.

]]> By: Derek http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13992 Derek Mon, 26 May 2008 06:18:26 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13992 Oh true. I think that over time I've become someone who expects the worst in the hope that I will be surprised. I'm rather averse to disappointment! Sometimes I can see someone's good thing is another person's disappointment (think one man marries the woman of his dreams while some other guy that pines after her misses his opportunity). But in a lot of things, I can't really see how disappointment can lead to the good. Maybe I don't have enough experiences? Oh true. I think that over time I’ve become someone who expects the worst in the hope that I will be surprised. I’m rather averse to disappointment! Sometimes I can see someone’s good thing is another person’s disappointment (think one man marries the woman of his dreams while some other guy that pines after her misses his opportunity). But in a lot of things, I can’t really see how disappointment can lead to the good. Maybe I don’t have enough experiences?

]]> By: Ms. Q http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13909 Ms. Q Sat, 24 May 2008 19:51:58 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13909 Expectations about such things like a chair bearing our weight - that's also right there with taking things for granted. It also depends on what you're expecting! Some people always expect the worse and of course, some always expect good things to happen and one person's good thing is another person's disappointment. Expectations about such things like a chair bearing our weight - that’s also right there with taking things for granted. It also depends on what you’re expecting! Some people always expect the worse and of course, some always expect good things to happen and one person’s good thing is another person’s disappointment.

]]> By: Derek http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13846 Derek Fri, 23 May 2008 19:57:15 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13846 Really? How come?? Really? How come??

]]> By: jen shih http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13844 jen shih Fri, 23 May 2008 19:21:14 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13844 oh derek wong, you are the utmost T i've yet to encounter. oh derek wong, you are the utmost T i’ve yet to encounter.

]]> By: Derek http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13842 Derek Fri, 23 May 2008 18:51:00 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13842 Yeah I agree, I don't think so either. I was hoping the "dreamy" would get that sarcasm bell ringing. :) Yeah I agree, I don’t think so either. I was hoping the “dreamy” would get that sarcasm bell ringing. :)

]]> By: clue http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13841 clue Fri, 23 May 2008 18:39:57 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13841 i'm not sure it's a "dreamy expectation" that the chair will hold up my weight... i’m not sure it’s a “dreamy expectation” that the chair will hold up my weight…

]]> By: Derek http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13831 Derek Fri, 23 May 2008 15:49:53 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13831 Haha what?? Not that I disagree, but I don't know why I got that for this post. Anyways, I take it that you don't agree with it then...? Haha what?? Not that I disagree, but I don’t know why I got that for this post.

Anyways, I take it that you don’t agree with it then…?

]]> By: Emily http://www.goingthewongway.com/2008/05/22/pleasantly-surprised-horribly-disappointed/#comment-13809 Emily Fri, 23 May 2008 07:45:49 +0000 http://www.goingthewongway.com/?p=255#comment-13809 you are so weird. you are so weird.

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