Proud Of Nothing

Tagged as: Christianity, Life, Political, Rant, Relationships Jan 13

People will get proud over anything. Even those that have nothing to be proud of will somehow find themselves becoming proud of something. It’s rather amazing really. When you stop to think about it, none of us really has anything to be proud of.

There are a wide variety of things that pride is claimed. I think that the most ridiculous ones are those things over which we have no control. Here are some of my favorites:

1. Nationalism/Patriotism/Geographic devotion

   This is rampant around the world and throughout all of time. However, it’s rather silly to be proud of where you come from simply because that’s where you came from, don’t you think? Sure it’s a great way to connect to people when you first meet them, but how much do you really have to be proud of if you grew up somewhere? Usually it’s not too much.

   I think that perhaps the only thing that I could understand about this is if one had to grow up in a difficult environment. It shapes a person to be able to grow up in that type of surrounding. But for all of those people who are proud of where they grew up, what country they were born in, what their heritage is, and so on, you better rethink it. Because you had no hand in that.

   And to think that people get into wars over this issue all of the time is mind boggling. You mean to tell me that you hate that guy because of where he was born? But he had no control over that, he didn’t choose to be born there!

2. Height

   Have you met people who were proud of their height? I think that might be one of the most ridiculous things ever because you absolutely have no control over your height. You can lose or gain weight, have plastic surgery to fix your looks, and any number of things to modify your physical appearance.

   But what can you do about your height? Diddly squat, I do believe. Unless you have that limb lengthening surgery. Anyways, once again you have no control over how tall you are/will be. You can hope for good genes, but it’s much more impressive to just be able to deal with those that you’ve been given. And better yet, it’s impressive to be able to overlook (no pun intended) it in others.

3. Discovering Music Artists/Clothing Brands

   I mean really? You’re going to be proud of the fact that you found out about a band before anyone else did? You had no hand in their success. You’re not playing bass or pounding those drums for them. All you did was take a little listen.

   Okay sure, it’s very nice that you spend the time and try out different artists than the popular fare served up to the masses. Maybe you even spent a little bit of money to try them out. But when the band becomes popular, if you find yourself bringing up the fact that you listened to them for years, I’ll have you know that I think that you’re a lame-o.

   Same thing goes for clothing brands (and probably a slew of other things). You’re not making the clothes, you’re just buying a sweater. $20 bucks. You daredevil you.

4. Age

   Whether you’re young or old, what can you really say about your age? It won’t change a lick no matter what you do. You can lie about it, you can deceive others by changing your appearance, but this is an absolute in this world that you have no control over.

   I think it’s so interesting when people see their age as something to be proud of. In the past I’ve seen it because people think that they’re immediately wiser for the simple fact that they’ve lived more days. I grant them that it’s generally true that wisdom comes with age. But isn’t that usually more like decades of experience?

   Growing up in school, I was meeting people with years or less worth more days who thought that they were somehow wiser than I. I thought (and still do) think that is just ludicrous. It’s like they can’t find anything to be proud of so they just grasp for something that nobody can change. How about instead of doing that we go out and actually gain some of that useful wisdom by getting a life, huh?

5. Salvation

   Well I’m a Christian. Maybe you knew that, maybe you didn’t. Now you do. Anyways, I’ve got a bone to pick with those people that speak of their salvation with an air of superiority, as if they did anything at all except believe. This might stir up the pot a little bit, but there isn’t much that separates you from that unsaved guy next to you. I boast in Jesus Christ, too, but He did the work, not I. I just said, “Yes, I’ll believe.”

Building Relationships

Tagged as: Life, Relationships Dec 31

I’ve come to notice recently that relationships are very similar to a house of cards.

Alright they’re not always like a house of cards, they very much can be in certain ways. When one is just starting to get to know another person, there is a lot of feeling out in conversation. Both people need to be talking and questions need to be asked. This is some basic knowledge about relationships.

Almost more importantly than how to build a relationship, though, is how easy it is to destroy it. It’s important to know how relationships can be destroyed because that is the only way that it can be avoided. It seems to me that I can very easily liken the building of a relationship to the creation of a house of cards. For both creations it takes far greater time and effort to build them up than it takes to destroy them. With the house of cards all you need is an inadvertent swipe of the hand or even an exhaled breath to cause it all to come tumbling down. With relationships (whether friendships, romantic relationships, or otherwise) a simple outburst, a snide comment, a hurtful action, or even an ill-advised joke can undo all of the time and effort involved in developing a relationship.

I think that whether you’ve been on the receiving end of a one of these relationship destroyers or whether you’ve dished one out yourself, you know that they’re almost never worth it. Unfortunately I think that most of the time people don’t even know what they’ve done. They can’t see it because it’s not visual, it’s within the person. Take a look around and you’ll see cards everywhere.

A Quote About True Friends

Tagged as: Life, Quote, Relationships Dec 03

Friends are such an integral part of life. They are there for us to have fun, to share with, and to truly live our lives with. And, just as in many of our relationships in life, they can be a source of pain. I’m not necessarily saying that I feel that right now, but that doesn’t discount the truth in the statement, does it?

People have a tendency to let relationships deteriorate. It takes constant effort and a willing heart to maintain those relationships that might otherwise fall by the way side. Being a couple of years out of college I can so easily see how much my friendships and relationships with a lot of my friends has done so. It’s on the one hand tragic but on the other hand just a fact of life.

Wow I really was thinking that I need some lighter-hearted posts. Oh well.

So here’s my quote, tell me what you think.

True friends do not prove themselves in the exciting moments of life. Hardships and joyous occasions are not where they’re found.

No, the proving ground of a true friend is in the mundane and dull moments of the everyday life.
-Derek Wong

Well I’ve actually thought about this before, but I had never gotten around to find out whether or not someone else has said it before I have. As usual, someone probably did. But it’d take too long to try to find and properly give them credit. So if someone else happens upon it, I’ll gladly give someone else the credit.

Basically all I mean is that it’s so easy to feel close to people when they’re going through things that are interesting. But life consists of only a few of those moments. It’s so much nicer to have friends and people around you that actually want to hear about the days when life isn’t as exciting or exceptionally interesting. I feel like I’ve said that before, but it must have been in conversation rather than on my blog. Granted it’s even better to just be interesting all of the time, but I digress.

A Quote For Regret And Rejection

Tagged as: Life, Relationships Nov 26

Sometimes we have to choose our poison, don’t we? It’s not always blue pill or red pill, sometimes it’s bad and worse. In any case, I feel like I must have heard this quote, but I can’t seem to find its source online. I think that it’s pretty good, what do you think?

Regret is 10 times worse than rejection.
-Derek Wong

For some reason in my head the quote actually is “100 times,” but I think that’s an exaggeration. I’m more comfortable with 10 times. So if nobody has made this quote, and I actually did make up this quote then that’s just fine with me. And if someone did say this, let me know so that I can give due credit.

I’d venture to guess that many people choose regret simply because it is the easier of the two. Rejection is a pain that we all know and despise. It hurts us upfront and in the short term quite a lot. On the other hand regret takes some time to fester and build up its power. And it’s a longer term pain to boot. No thanks.

Lovely Junk Or Useful Pain

Tagged as: Relationships, Seen-Around Aug 03

While cleaning up, one begins to find objects accumulated over the years that are of a few varieties.

There is the out and out junk that is immediately tossed. That’s the easy stuff. The wrappers, the broken toys, the school work that is no longer pertinent.

Then there is the the items that hold significance but are not really too useful. Those are the cherished toys and so on that at one time were loved, but are no longer. These often will get kept for sentimental reason or donated so that another could love it.

Along the same vein, there are those items that were very amusing but for a much briefer amount of time than the previous category. In my mind I see the gag gifts, the awards, and the other one-time items that were cherished but for a moment but are now essentially trash.

Contrast this with those items that were dearly beloved before but are now regarded with a bit of distaste. Perhaps these are gifts given by an old flame or a long-lost friend. In that moment and for some time afterwards the item was important, but as a result of happenings in your relationship with the other person(s) involved it has changed its meaning.

So what is more worthwhile, a piece of (essentially) junk that holds memories of a grand time or an item that is actually useful but holds more bitter memories?

I am not one to pack like a rat, but I like to keep special things. I actually think that I would opt to save the latter over the former even though I would enjoy the former more often. The hard things make us who we are, and I like to remember where I came from. The journey is important. What say you?